A Companion of Sorrow
Sorrow is with me, lurking in the shadows of all the hope I infuse into my soul. It finds its way to the forefront and stares at me up close laughing, really laughing out loud. It stops me with its brazen visual reality and sharp tones that penetrate my senses. It catches me off guard as I sleep and trips me up when I'm awake. It calls to me with words that echo on every side telling me I will not win this one. It is the one most important to me, the prayer of more than half my lifetime, which has been whispered in reverence, shouted in angst, stammered out in tears, and pleaded in silence. It is the one that has driven me to my knees in brokenness and kept me believing. Unanswered prayer has kept me holding on to this hope.
It is not the answers but the longings, the unsatisfied, the prodigals, the hopeless, the crisis that cause me to grab this thing called hope. When helpless I am stretched beyond my own resources and I hope in His. When I can't believe in this world anymore I reach out and believe in Christ. Just acknowledgement of my need draws Him near. And when He is near it is not to just answer my prayers, it is to love me in whatever way will keep me thirsting after Him. He always fills and then empties. We inhale to exhale so we can inhale again. As I keep placing all my longings on Him, He will take care of what concerns me.
Our heartaches are our lifeline to the heart of God,
because our heart aches for His heart.
He gives us joy, but often it's mingled with the sorrow. Christ bore our sorrows and iniquities so He could relate to us. We must have sorrow and pain to give and receive hope to each other. So sorrow, yes I see you, I hear you, but I welcome you, for as much as you taunt me and haunt me, you are leading me to Christ and giving me hope.